The Warty Witch

Just a quick history lesson. Go and research Joan of Arc, it is a part of history we should all read about.

And now this leads me to my witchy wart story.

I was lying in bed, and I started to remember years ago when my parents would go out on a Friday, or a Saturday night and they would come home later in the night and have a house party with other neighbors that had been out on the same evening.

Back in that day women would dress up and the majority of people smoked inside their homes. I grew up with four other siblings so when the parents would come home later in the evening the house would have been very quiet until the company arrived.

My father would have taken the babysitter home and then the next thing we knew there was all kind of noise coming from the main floor. We had a two-story house and all of the children slept upstairs. We would wake up, listen to the sounds, and try to figure out what was going on. My sisters and I would nudge each other and make a decision – do we go downstairs, or do we stay in bed and pretend we are asleep? There was really only one decision to be made.

Go downstairs and see what was going on. Well, there would be a lot going on. The living room would be blue with smoke, women sitting on their husband’s knees, talking, laughing, joke telling and often a story or two.

There was this one gentleman by the name of Vic Pakota, and he owned a store in town called McLeod’s Hardware Store. On this one particular middle of the night party, my sisters and I woke up, Vic was there and he was always interested in visiting with us kids.

At this time my younger sisters and I all had warts on our hands. I had about 30 or so, but my one sister had well over 100 warts. Our town had recently opened an outdoor swimming pool, and someone decided that people with warts could not go in the pool as they were contagious. This is not true, but it was the late 60’s or early 70’s (just another old wives’ tale).

For my sisters and I, not being able to go to the pool was devasting. It was the only thing to do in the summertime in a small town.

That evening Mr. Pakota offered to buy my sisters warts as well as mine. He would pay us $0.05 for each wart that we could count together. That evening my sister was about $5 or $6 richer and my youngest sister and I were about $1 richer.

Now the amazing part was that within 7 to 10 days our warts disappeared. They were completely gone. Prior to this evening my sister had been to the doctor, and they had tried burning her warts off, leaving her with permanent scars on her hands, but the warts continued to return. And as crazy this story sounds after this evening the warts never came back.

Now, let’s fast forward to around 2006. My oldest daughter brought a friend home from university and his hands were full of warts. I could not believe how many warts he had and all the scars on his hands from doctors trying to burn them off and using medications to dry them out. Upon seeing his hands, I offered that evening to purchase his warts for $0.25 each. With inflation and stuff, I thought they must be worth at least $0.25.

Of course, he did not believe that his warts would go away nor did I actually. I knew it had worked for my sisters and I, but I really didn’t think I could purchase his warts and have them disappear from his hands. Afterall, he had lived with these crazy warts for years and had tried many remedies to no avail, nothing had worked.

That evening we counted his hundreds of warts, and I bought them from him. And guess what? His warts went away within about one to two weeks, and they never returned. And this young gentleman had like three or four hundred warts on his hands. We are not talking about a few simple warts here, there were a lot.

This wart witch thing happened about 17 years ago. Just recently he phoned my daughter and told her his warts never ever did return after that evening. He is still baffled by it and believes I must be a witch to do what I did. And who knows? Perhaps I am a witch!

So, if you or someone in your household has warts you may contact me, and I will purchase your warts for you. I’m not going to guarantee that they will go away but there is a good chance they will. It is a phenomenon that is very hard to explain. Perhaps it should be looked upon as paying it forward. A good deed was done to me and my sisters, and I paid that deed forward when I had the chance.

What is my song choice for this blog? I had to think about it for a day or two, which often happens but I had to go back to where I started – Joan of Arc.

Leonard Cohen (famous Canadian singer, songwriter) released this song as a single in 1971. Jennifer Warnes recorded it with Leonard Cohen in 1986 on the album Famous Blue Raincoat. This album was a tribute to Leonard Cohen. It is a beautiful song and Cohen imagines a conversation between Joan and the flames that consume her.

When I was in Montreal several years ago there is a mural along a high-rise in the downtown district that is very lifelike of Leonard Cohen and worth going to see if you should visit this city. I listened to his “Halleluiah” song and toasted him with a lovely glass of wine while listening to his song. This song has been covered many times by various artists and is just one of the many songs that Cohen has written. Take time to listen to Cohen and his songs – they are worth the listen.

And there you have it – the spooky blog for Halloween! Have a great October. And I hate to use the “s n o w” word, but it’s coming. So, get your pots and summer lawn furniture put away before it does snow and find your snow shovel. Yuck!!!!

This column is sponsored by MacKenzie Funeral Chapel and Crematorium – We will be there when you need us – Bev and Brian Stobbs

130 9th St. E, Prince Albert, SK

Phone: (306) 763-8488

https://mackenziechapel.ca/

by Merle Lee Ann Pratt – Merle Lee Ann’s Kitchen, author of “A Baker’s Dozen”

The Warty Witch

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