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Sorry Everybody

Jul 4, 2011 | 7:25 AM

for paNOW

Prince William is coming to Canada and the same question arises: why can’t he be the next king? Poor Charles. Nobody respects or much likes him. On the other hand, a little derision beats the heck out of the active dislike of Charles l. On January 30, 1648, he got his head chopped off because nobody liked him.
Why doesn’t Charles step aside? In fact, why doesn’t the whole monarchy business sink into oblivion? Plainly said: he can’t and they can’t.

A man we met in Scotland muttered, “If his brain was dynamite, he couldn’t blow his hat off.” It’s true Charles is not as bright as he thinks he is. To whit: Charles recommended carrot juice and coffee bean enemas as a possible cure to cancer. The medical community was unimpressed. His position, and accident of birth, allowed this kind of view to be made public and gave it legitimacy while researchers spent dozens of years learning and working hard to beat cancer. He also made the monarchy look a bit dicey when he told Camilla he wished he was a tampon…

Does he realize that his interests and involvement in architecture, agriculture and medicine must stop the minute he becomes king? A monarch cannot take sides or direct action in any field. The purpose of a monarch is to unite, not divide.

For Charles to resign from the line of succession would take an act of parliament, approval by the relevant Commonwealth countries and the Queen’s signature. Hence, the only viable way to get out of being king is for Camilla to become Roman Catholic. British monarchs are not allowed to rule if they are Roman Catholic or are married to one. That sounds prejudiced and archaic but, the Monarch is the head of the Anglican community i.e. all Anglican churches in the world. Obviously, it is not possible to have a Roman Catholic as monarch then.

The monarchy can only be removed by revolution or an act of parliament. Don’t hold your breath. Abdication only gets him out of the picture but does not remove the monarchy. Although several Commonwealth countries probably will become republics when Queen Elizabeth dies, the movement to declare the UK a republic received only 20 per cent of those who bothered to vote on it.

There is the possibility that the Queen will rule for a long time yet. She is 83. Her mother lived to 103. That would make Charles 83 at the time of his succession. As his personal wealth is about $2.3 billion, he can fill the time with plenty to do and see.

By the way, in the days of drawing and quartering the unlovable, once the body was quartered, a piece was sent to each of four towns. Fancy getting a left leg and a liver delivered to the door. I wonder if the recipient could say, “No thanks, I didn’t like him either?”

The head was put on a pike (a nasty weapon like a spear but with more mean stuff on the working end) and used to decorate London Bridge. Quaint folk in the good old days what?